Me [25F] with my EX [29 M] 1. 5 years, Is this emotional abuse and help coping

So I started dating this guy around March of last year. It was really rocky because he initially didnt want to start dating because he called it "useless lables" but he agreed.he's a very confident guy with a middle school libido so he would always ask for sex which I didnt mind. But I didnt have a lot of sexual experience and his expectations were of hentai standards. He claimed I was too clingy for wanting to spend time with him and yells at me when we played games together because I wasn't playing on his level. He constantly compared me to his exes and told me that I needed to lose weight so I could be fuckable.He eventually started distancing himself and as I found out later he was trying to find women to fuck or have phone sex online while maintaining a relationship with me. I called him out on it because I felt he was cheating which he denied because he didnt "act on it". Broke up with him and its been on off him trying to get me back giving me empty promises of changing and that he wanted to make me happy. Ive indulged him a few times because I was lonely and hopeful of him but it ended the same way.My mental state has gone down to a point where Ive gotten suicidal because of him lowering my self worth because Ive been demoted to side fuck fallback. And now he's shit talking me to other women to gain pity;dr Guy cheated on me and took advantage of me loving him. If you guys have had experience can you give me advice for how you coped and is this emotional abuse??? He was my first boyfriend so Im not really sure of how to handle myself. Please be kind... via /r/relationships

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