My [27F] boyfriend [30] is more interested in looking at hentai/ playing video games than doing anything with me

He and I have been together almost five years. We are both gamers, work full time and have recently moved in together. When we first got together it was nothing but intimacy. Although he goes to a bunch of anime cons every year, and seems he only cares about sex after the cons and never in-between, unless I tell him it upsets me that we don’t connect that way anymore (1-2 months until I get frustrated) He also has chosen to play his video games rather than be together and sometimes we go 6-7 months with no real contact. He pretty much refuses to cuddle at night or after the deed is done. Acts like sex is a chore. I have tried to cosplay to the characters I know he looks at hentai of. I have tried to play the games he wants to play but he shows no interest in sharing his experiences with me. He always says he is too tired and isn’t interested in me even helping him when his needs arise. Until he goes to cons. He says he has no kinks, but his tablet and phone are connected and I know what hentai he watches most often... I’ve tried changing my appearance and it sparks interest for a minute... then nothing. Talking doesn’t do anything but make him feel bad. For awhile I suspected him of cheating, but found no evidence, except one message of him flirting with another girl about a year ago, but nothing came of it. Deep down, I know he really does love me. I just think he doesn’t have any interest in me, my needs or emotions. I’m about out of ideas to spark interest in him, and need advice. Things to do, say, try a different approach perhaps. I’m lost, and love the guy to death.TL;DR boyfriend not interested in sex or any emotional connections, except for anime girls. Cosplaying doesn’t work. Any ideas? via /r/relationship_advice

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