The England Kid: Stalkers from Hetalian Hell


A/N: When I was about 12 years old, I was pretty awkward, as most people are in seventh grade. I was a pretty big weeaboo, however, I was pretty tame compared to some in the stories on this website, but I may be biased. My friends and I into the slightly mainstream weeaboo stuff like Black Butler, Durarara!!, Vocaloid, Death Note, and, of course, Hetalia. Anyway, here's the cast for part one:Nugget: My best friend whom I met a few months before the story unfolded. C: A friend Nugget and I were close to at the time of this story. I knew her for a few years before the story unfolded. England Kid: The victim.Nugget and I had been friends for almost a year and we were into anime with attractive dudes any weeaboo would fawn over. In early 2011, I discovered an anime called "Hetalia", which catered to our every need of fangirling over 2D animated men. At lunch, Nugget, myself, and some other friends in our group were talking about Hetalia and what episode we were on in the series. As we were talking, I turned my attention to a short, blond guy in our grade and said, "Hey, doesn't that guy totally look like England?" and, thus, the England Kid was born.Now, there was nothing particularly attractive or special about this individual, just the fact that he looked like the character England, minus the green eyes. Nugget and I would always sit near him and his group of friends at lunch and later talk about how cute he was and how great it would be to date England from Hetalia. As the days went by, he and his friends started to notice we were creeping them and they began to move to a different hangout spot. Did that stop us? Of course not. We decided to find out anything we could about him. His name, birthday, favourite things, place of residence, etc. I am not exactly sure what we were thinking when we eventually came to this conclusion. Looking back on it, I assumed that we thought if we knew everything about him, we could integrate him into our group of friends.As we began, Nugget was already on top of operation England Kid and found his name and images of him through Facebook. They were pictures of him from a few years ago, but it did not stop us from squealing and making headcanons about his life and personality. For example, we had some pretty racy and embarrassing pictures of Hetalia's England and we were like, "wow, he would look so great like this". It was absolutely cringe-worthy but worth looking back on for a few laughs. This proceeded for a few months until our plans began to unravel.Now in eighth grade, Nugget and I were still full-blown into this obsession, but we still didn't know where he lived. My mother overheard one of our conversations about this issue because we wanted to be super cool weeaboo detectives and told me she dated his father years ago. She told me where he lived and, as it turned out, he lived two streets away from me. Knowing this, Nugget and I went to his apartment, scoping out anything we could in secret. I had a small Nokia flip phone at the time and took pictures around where he lived in hopes we could see a glance of him through a window, however, we had no such luck. On the other hand, eighth grade was ending, and we were going on a class trip with every class in our grade. Since I am from a small town in Canada, the class trip was nothing extravagant. We were touring a local community college to get kids interested in the trades or some shit like that. I'm not entirely sure why they would promote this to eighth graders who would don't really give a shit about college yet, but we were excited. It was our chance to go on a trip with our beloved England Kid.The trip itself was alright and the culinary arts students at the community college were nice enough to make everyone meals near the end of the tour. There were several tables available and, fortunately for us, the England Kid had a table with several empty seats. Nugget and I knew this was the opportunity of a lifetime and convinced our group of friends, who were aware of our adoration for this guy, to sit with him and his friends. The food was served, and the table was set. Our master plan now was to get him to perhaps have a crush on one of us, so we could proudly say we were dating England from Hetalia. A daring feat for a now 13-year old weeaboo. The conversation started off well and he actually seemed like a nice person. Another friend in our group at the time, C, decided to let him in on Nugget and I's feelings about him. Our plan was about to come crumbling down.C told him Nugget and I thought he looked like the character England from Hetalia and his initial reaction was "Hetalia? Is that like Hentai? That's kind of weird". Oh boy, was he in for a ride. C, Nugget, and I explained the concept of the anime and he seemed okay with it. Nugget even showed him images of the character. He and his friends agreed that he looked like England, but the England Kid didn't see what the big deal was. We then somehow thought it would be a good idea to show him the more embarrassing, racy images of England. He then started to get weirded out. This was not the reaction Nugget and I was suspecting. How could he not like the fact that two nerdy female weebs were completely in love with him? C then said, "well, they've been stalking you for like a year because you look like him. They even know where you live". The atmosphere became instantly uncomfortable. Nugget and I, the great weeaboo detectives, had no way to explain ourselves out of this one. He asked questions to try and see if C’s statements were accurate. The jig was up, and I felt I had to answer his questions truthfully. Nugget and I could not come up with any clever excuse and our truthfulness ended up backfiring. After this, he knew, and he would never cater to our weeaboo fantasies. He even went as far as to stop wearing a shirt he has with a UK flag on it that Nugget and I loved so much. However, this incident did not stop us, and it would follow Nugget, myself, and the England Kid right into the next stage: high school.Stay tuned for part two! via /r/weeabootales https://ift.tt/2wGNAXu

Postar um comentário

0 Comentários