No sex drive anymore. My (37F) body (and mind, I guess) doesn't really work and I'm kind of lost


Sorry this has become long and also, sorry in advance, english it's not my main language!I have been with my partner (34M) for 3 years and a half, we don't have children and we don't plan to have any.Before him I had 3 long relationships and some adventures.Just to give you a general idea: I always had a nice relationship with sex, come from an open minded family, I generally think sex and a good communication are super important in a couple. Also, juste to complete the story, I've always had fast and good orgasms, I'd say in my life I was used to have an orgasm 90% of the time I was having intercourse (and I'm pretty sure it's a very good average).Now, the first 1.5 year of our relationship we were kind of travelling all the time, so sex was funny: we always had to invent situations, sometimes we were stuck with people and we could't wait to be alone, so no routine at all.We've then settled and we've been now living together for 2 years, it's nice to have our place and I love this guy to pieces.But.. in the last 6 months, things have been deteriorating A LOT. It started with my body shutting down, feeling nothing and of course impossible to have an orgasm maybe once every 3/4 intercourses.Every time it was starting really good but it was like a switch going off. I didn't think to much about it at the time, thinking it was maybe stress.But then it became worse and worse. Sometimes we were trying to keep it going a little to see if the switch will turn on again without any result and it ended up hurting.Then I realised that my mind started playing an active role on it: we were starting having sex, then my mind would start thinking "is it working that time? maybe not again? I hope it will work this time" and EVIDENTLY this would turn me off immediately.Now I'm in a situation where I hardly ever want to, I am almost unable to get physically aroused and when we try it becomes painful.I've tried to masturbate but it doesn't help either.In the past I loved to read sex stories and hentai comic. Today? they don't provoke anything.My partner is very patient, he says he's sure it's just stress from my work and my situation (I'm a freelancer and work has been crazy lately) but I don't want him to feel rejected (we've switched to just oral sex for the moment, basically me going down on him).I really don't know what to do, I'm going to see a doctor for a check-up but I don't even know what to ask, can it be physical? Or it's probably just mental?Just for the record, I had a endometrial polyp removed exactly one year ago but we started sex a month after the operation and everything was going great at the time.I'll try to contact a therapist too but we're not in our main country and although I speak the local language, I don't feel I will be confident enough to speak about my sex drive problems.I don't really know what I'm looking for, advices maybe? somebody who went through this? via /r/sexover30 https://ift.tt/2Q2KWnx

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