So I don't share this much with any friend of mine than some close. But thats wht they say this community is all about. 5 months ago, i went through a break up after 3 years of relationship, i know it seems like "its been 5 months, he must have recovered a lot". Well! Everybody's relationship is different, and everybody has their own time to recover. I was the one who did the break up, because i want an honest, non ignorant, non narcissist and courteous women in my life who can help me transform my life, because the people you want to live with must be amazing for if you want both of your life to be amazing, so there was a lot of mistakes i did, but the relationship got toxic and it was better to start a new one than to give it more time to fix it as i had already tried for a year or so, but couldn't change some of her behaviour which was really hurting, for example if we had a breakdown or if i told her i needed some time, for lets say a week or so, she would start talking to some guy who had a crush on her or something, to make me jealous and punish me.....i couldn't change her, maybe i just didn't tried hard enough...but it ended. It was hard for me to feel her as there was so much resentment but i had so much love for her, i mean she meant the world to me a few years ago. Then when i broke up with her, she abused me by telling me of the guys she's having affair or has proposed her or met her or now days, she's in a relationship with somebody......and it hurt me, i got back to porn, worse...i got back to hentai which i left so hard, so fuckin hard a year ago, it was hard for me but i couldn't control myself and still started callin her to talk to her. And then she hit me again by telling me about the guy she's currently dating. After that, she ignored me for a hour and i had lost my patience, i had gotten aware of the pattern i was falling, so i was listening to hard core raps those days, i wrote a song for her to hurt her, really really bad so she wouldn't call me or text me or pick my call, so i wouldn't get that much hurt ever again.....i got weak again as i was pmo'ing in those days and called and texted her, but she didn't pick up as she's hurt for the first time now after our break up....., but after these 6 days of nofap, i have found my masculinity and manliness and have not called or texted helped and i m proud of myself. i hope to go 90 days this time... via /r/NoFap

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