I need a strangers opinion

So I guess to preface this I am a 22 year old guy, and I have no felt so bad in my entire life. I feel dirty and awful like I hurt someone even though I didn't. I deal with bad harm OCD/intrusive thoughts especially recently revolving around want if like I am a pedophile or a sexual sadist and feel terrible. I honestly have only ever wanted to help people and only want a normal adult relationship ... and looking back I'm not sure how this happened.... I first discovered porn when I was 13(?) and somehow feel into hardcore BDSM/hentai and the occasional rapey/tentacle hentai ( read like maybe 5 - 10 times?). I guess I was looking at this till I was 18ish I was watching normal stuff too but I feel like I am a terrible person for this. I would never hurt anyone so I am not sure where this comes from and all my relationships have been "vanilla" which has been more than satisfying. I want to know if anyone on here thinks I am an awful person. What would you say if your bf did this. Honestly, like I said I would never hurt anyone and tbh looking back I'm not even sure why I watched this... I would never want to do this to someone in real life. I just feel like I actually hurt a person by watching this and I am terrible for it. I really just want a "normal relationship" but I feel too screwed up for it.. I guess I want another's opinion via /r/TrueOffMyChest http://bit.ly/2QO91zG

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